Neil's first solid food

For better or worse, Neil's first solid food was carrots. Instead of buying baby food (as I'm sure we will) I wanted to try to puree something myself and see how that works.

I nursed Neil right before; that's supposed to coat his stomach so that his stomach can start to get used to new foods more gradually. He spit up after I nursed him, which might have been a sign to not do it. But normally when I nurse him he falls asleep and he was wide awake (took a nap right before I nursed him) so we figured this was a good chance. We figured he wasn't going to eat too much anyways.

One of his first bites. What is this spoon thing?

Hmmm do I like this?

Maybe... Let's try some more.
He kept trying to grab the spoon with his hands, which also made feeding him hard.

Hmm this might be some good stuff!

Haha the face.

So he did spit up both milk and carrots after he ate. Maybe we should have waited to try. But I froze the rest of it so we will try carrots for a few more days and see if he gets the hang of it, before introducing anything else. I'm considering avocado for the 2nd food to try.

Breastfeeding - 6 month milestone

I have been pretty quiet about breastfeeding because I do feel that is a bit TMI for what I'm willing to put out there on the internet. But the fact that I have exclusively breastfed Neil for 6 months honestly is a bit mind boggling and a HUGE milestone for me, so I wanted to talk about it just a little bit. I will for the most part avoid public TMI but I am more than willing to help anyone out, listen, or talk, if you have any questions. Just email me!

Part of the reason I can't believe I've actually made it to six months is because I really thought it was gross before I did it myself. When I was pregnant, I really didn't think I would nurse a baby. I thought the idea of it was weird and just blech. In fact, at our breastfeeding class at the midwife center, the nurse showed videos of moms breastfeeding babies and I refused to look at the screen. I didn't make a big deal about it but I looked away from the screen. And they had each of us hold a baby doll and pretend we were nursing and I refused to do that. I think Dave thought I was being ridiculous. But that just illustrates how not into it I was.

Why did I try to breastfeed? 

I don't really know if I can answer that. Other than that my Mom did it for all 3 of us (thanks, Mom!), it's cheaper than formula, and although I never really looked into it, there are a lot of benefits for both the mother and the baby.

Why do I like breastfeeding? 

The number one reason is the bonding experience I've had with Neil. I would not give that up for anything in the world. Sometimes I feel bad that Dave hasn't experienced this type of connection. He also didn't experience the feeling of being pregnant, the movement inside (not the way I did) from Neil, and actual contractions and labor. He supported me through all of that and he supports me through breastfeeding. But he will never feel what I am feeling. At the same time, though, he does have his own experiences that are different and special between Neil and him.

What were my personal challenges? 

First, breastfeeding initially was very challenging. We used a lot of skin to skin contact, but I had a day or so where Neil decided he wanted a bottle, not me, and we had to use a dropper to get him back to wanting to actually nurse. (Do NOT feed with a bottle too early. That was my mistake.) In addition, Neil was tongue tied. It made latching on very very painful until we figured it out. We asked the doctor about it and he said there was some tongue tie but not enough to make a difference. So I tried to push through it. But after a few weeks I said I was going to stop if it didn't get better. We ended up at the Breastfeeding Center. They had me nurse Neil and gave me tips, and then did an examination of both him and me. They saw his tongue tie and offered to take care of that. It was our choice, and we ultimately decided to do it. What a world of difference between the nursing before and the nursing after.

Second, it really does take a lot. Even now at 6 months, I plan my time around when I'm going to feed Neil or pump next. I always feed him right before we go somewhere to maximize the time out that I don't have to feed him. I don't have to do it as much but I used to nurse Neil in the car a LOT. That was just so I could go out. And I've gotten more comfortable nursing in public. I know it makes other people uncomfortable, but I've gotten good at not showing anything and Neil is a lot faster now. But initially, it felt like all I did EVER was nurse. 24 hours a day. 7 days a week.

Third, pumping and work. This is my biggest and continuing challenge. I hate pumping. If I just pumped I would not be doing this anymore. There are a lot of days I sit in the mother's room at work on the pump and think "I'm done with this. I hate this." And then I go home and nurse Neil and remember why I'm doing this. For him. Not for me. Pumping hurts me and I'm starting to realize that maybe some of the parts are the wrong size. I just went to Chicago for a work trip and without going into details, the aftermath on my body was terrible. But that also made me start to question how I'm pumping and realize (too bad it took over 12 weeks of pumping at work to realize this) that I must be doing some things wrong. So I'm working on that right now. Besides that, though, it makes work a lot harder. I have to go to the mother's room consistently and my job is meetings. So I have to leave in the middle of meetings, or miss meetings, and I miss out on what's going on and the knowledge I need to do my job. That's really hard as well.

Finally, what advice do I have to give those who are thinking about breastfeeding?

Stick with it. It DOES get better. Their mouths get bigger. You both need to learn how to do it. It won't be as often after awhile.

With that said though, if it really hurts, especially beyond the initial latch, get help. Lactation consultants are AMAZING. The Breastfeeding Center in Pittsburgh is AMAZING. I would not be where I am today without either of those.

Do not introduce a bottle too early. Or a pacifier. You need to let the baby suck as much as they want to/need to. It helps establish a good milk supply. It helps with hormones on your end. And it helps the baby adjust to being in this world. Plus it can be a good excuse to get away when you need a break from all those visitors. ;)

At this point I'm really hoping to make it to a year. We'll see though! We did feed Neil his first solid food yesterday and we'll see how that goes. I'm not sure he ate anything but I do have pictures, which I will put in a future post.

Turtle Trot

This is my 3rd year of being at the Turtle Trot and the 1st year I've been able to run it. Last year I walked it because I was pregnant (but I don't mention that in my recap because it wasn't public yet) and on orders not to run in the heat. Two years ago I dropped a cymbal on my toe, sliced it open, and wasn't allowed to run.

A small group of us has signed up for the Hershey Half Marathon relay, which is in October. We will probably start trying to do smaller races just to get motivated. I know I really need motivation right now; it's hard to run when taking care of an infant! Two of my other friends who will be in Hershey also ran this race. Dave walked it with Neil in the jogging stroller. And two other friends ran it as well. Here's the crew (taken after the race):

This is a very flat race. I ran with my friend Laura, who is also my other half of the relay team for Hershey. We actually were in Chicago for a work conference earlier in the week and had a morning run there. We both said we need to train more than we currently are or Hershey is going to be hard.

All 5 of us (since Dave was walking, they started 2 minutes later) took off at the same time, but the other three ended up ahead fairly quickly. I think the hardest thing about the race is not getting completely absorbed by the energy and starting out way way too fast. I think for the other three it was a good pace but Laura and I hung back.

I told Laura this isn't the most scenic 5k around, and it isn't. I don't really have a lot to say about the route. There were a few people standing outside houses watching, and it was along the river. It's an out and back course so you can see most people either when they are coming back if they're faster or when you're coming back if they're slower. We missed John, so he must not have been too far ahead of us. (Although it was out and back, it's a circle at the end and he was probably around the circle as we entered it.)

We ran straight for probably about .75 miles before walking for the first time. I thought that was really good considering for both of us how little we have been running. From then on it was mostly running with walk breaks. We did run through the turnaround point; there's a place with a traffic light and cops stopping the traffic, and I remember from last year that it seemed like some of the drivers were irritated about having to stop for "some walkers" so I asked Laura if we could run that and she said sure.

They had two water stops, just before 1 mile and just after 2 miles. We walked a bit after we got to the 2nd water stop, and Laura said she was probably going to walk the rest of the way because her foot was feeling kind of weird. So I took off and ran the last .6 or .7 miles by myself. It felt amazing, although after I did it I felt bad and figured I should have stuck with her the rest of the way. I'm sure Dave would just say yep that's typical Jen, gets too competitive and stuff. I just want to go.

I used to be able to gauge my pace but right now I can't, so I was surprised after I took off on my own that I was around a 10:00 pace. So I let myself get comfortable and looked at my watch and was at about a 9:30 pace! I pushed a bit at the end and my pace for my last 0.13 miles was at a 8:46 pace.

Here's the overall mile data:

Distance	Time	Total
1	11:51	11:51
2	13:33	25:23
3	11:44	37:08
3.13	01:11	38:18

These times are off the official time by just a bit because I started my watch a few seconds late, and when we paused at the 2nd water break my watch auto stopped. I don't have the official time yet but will put that on the recap page when it's posted online. They did post them there but I was talking too much and never looked closely enough.

Dave walked with Neil and beat our time last year. Last year we finished in 54ish minutes and this year he was somewhere around 49 minutes. Neil was awake most of the way (so Dave says) but was sound asleep when he crossed the finish line. His head was cocked to the side (need to prop his head with a towel or something from now on) so I could tell when Dave rounded the corner that Neil was out!

Moments

These are the moments that make everything so worth it:

When I feel like I'm being watched and I realize from across the room that Neil is looking at me, and when I glance up his whole face brightens as he smiles.

When I play piano with him in the bouncer right next to me, and I realize he isn't playing so I glance over and he's just watching me play piano. And when I am singing and all of a sudden he's making noises (maybe "singing" as well).

When he's sitting in his dad's lap, reading a book together, looking at what his dad is pointing at on the page and his hand is on his dad's hand.

When he's eating, and he stops eating to turn his head, look straight at me, make sure he has my full attention, give a big smile, and then go right back to eating.

When I put him in his crib, kiss him good night, and he closes his eyes knowing and trusting that he's safe.

Pittsburgh Zoo

We bought a membership to the zoo and this is the 2nd time we've gone. The first time, Neil slept through everything. This time, he was asleep from being in the car for about the first half of the zoo and when he was awake he did seem to notice some of the animals. If they were still or further away though, he didn't seem to understand what we were pointing at. He seemed to like fish the most.

It's hard to see the fish but Dave was pointing and it was close enough to the glass that I think Neil could see it.
Love how he kept putting his feet on the glass.

More fish and getting used to looking at them

I'm glad it's ok for kids to touch the glass.

Big fish! Neil didn't seem to be bothered by the size.

Standing in the shark tank

He didn't actually watch the sharks too much although I think he was watching this one.

It was some kind of family fun weekend and this was his first time with his feet in the sand.

Sleep Training

Neil has been a great baby but sleep has been hard.

To make this post more interesting, I'm adding pictures of the weird positions Neil sleeps in

Neil's doctor recommended the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, so I bought that on my Kindle. I would recommend buying this type of book in paperback or hard copy because it's one that you want to bounce around in and it's really hard to do that and find where you want to be on electronic format. But this seems like a good book. I later also bought Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems based on a recommendation from a friend who has a baby exactly 6 months (to the day and hour!) older than Neil.

Most of these pictures were taken with our video camera which we use for a monitor.

After reading both of these books we realized that Neil has two sleep issues right now.

One is a bedtime that's too late- he will not go down for the night until 11:30 or 12:00 (midnight). It doesn't matter if we start the bedtime routine earlier, or even if we get him down in the crib earlier. If it's before 11:30 or midnight, he treats it like a nap and sleeps from 10-45 minutes, then is wide awake again.

The other is a sleep association. He goes to sleep fine at daycare in the pack and play; in fact they have told me he's their best sleeper. (I keep asking how they do it.) When he's home, he doesn't nap very well unless one of us is holding him, and bedtime is the worst part. The sleep association is wanting to be held to go to sleep or stay asleep. When we put him to bed, it's like walking a tightrope. We have to let him fall completely asleep in our arms, and then very gently and carefully, slowly walk to his room, slowly lower him into the crib, tentatively pull our arms out from under him, maybe leave a hand or arm on him for another few minutes, and the entire time we are watching for his eyes to pop open and the screaming to start if we don't do it just right or he isn't sound asleep enough. If he wakes up, then we have to hold him until he again falls deep asleep before attempting the crib again.

With the sleep association, it seems to be more just when he initially goes to bed; unless he's having a sleep regression he will stay in the crib just fine until the morning. We have a video monitor that is on all night and I've seen him wake up in the middle of the night, move around with eyes wide open, and go back to sleep on his own. So between that and daycare, we knew that he could soothe himself to sleep on his own.

We have been exhausted, especially since we get up early. I get up before 5am each morning to get to work around 6:15-6:30. Dave would usually stay up later with him getting him to sleep while I went to bed but often I laid in bed knowing that they weren't sleeping and unable to sleep myself. So we decided to try sleep training per the Ferber method (Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems). We actually tried it at about 4 and a half months but after reading Ferber's book I realized that we tried it too early (moreso too early at night not really age wise), before Neil's natural bedtime, so he just cried and screamed and we eventually gave up. We wanted to wait until he was at least 5 months old and give it a few weeks before trying again.

We decided to do this 4th of July weekend because we kind of had 4 days off where we could catch up on sleep. I say kind of because we hadn't planned on taking July 5th off but the daycare was closed (that's another story) so we had to stay home. I did do some work at home, and so did Dave (he has month close so we didn't know whether or not he could actually stay home until July 3rd) while the other one paid attention to Neil.

I'm typing this as we've completed 3 nights and we have definitely seen improvements so far. Knock on wood for me, ok? I wanted to write down how this worked for us though with times and how it lined up with Ferber's method.

He even ends up upside down sometimes.

July 3rd we kept Neil up and started the bedtime routine at around 10:30-10:45. We did the bedtime routine and put him in his crib at 11:00pm. The first night per the Ferber method, you check on the baby at 3 minutes, then 5 minutes, then 10 minutes, and keep checking every 10 minutes until they fall asleep. When you check them, you do not pick them up, you just let them know that you are there and everything is ok, and make sure that they are fine for your own peace of mind.

11:00 bed
11:04 check (4 minutes)
11:14 check (10 minutes)
11:26 check (12 minutes)
11:37 check (11 minutes)
11:58 check (21 minutes)
12:05 sleep (7 minutes)
1 hour and 5 minutes total

If we didn't follow the timing it was because Neil seemed to be calming down so we waited until the crying ramped up in case he was self soothing himself. Also, I didn't restart the timer until we (usually Dave, he did most of the checking) actually left the room again. We made sure we were not in there longer than a minute or two though and most of the time it was under a minute.

The next night we started the bedtime routine at 10:00 because we gave Neil a bath. He was tired from the night before so he was really sleepy as I was nursing him so we decided to just try and put him in the crib earlier. The book says to address one sleep issue at a time, but he was so tired it did seem to work getting him down for the night slightly earlier (and we really didn't put him to bed that much earlier). Per the book the second night you are supposed to check on a baby at 5 minutes, then 10 minutes, then every 12 minutes until they fall asleep.

10:47 bed
10:56 check (9 minutes)
11:08 check (12 minutes)
11:21 check (13 minutes)
11:31 sleep (10 minutes)
44 minutes total

By the third night this was both wearing on us. Although the second night was better, it's really hard to hear your baby crying and not go get him. We waited until about 10:00 or so to start the bedtime routine and gave him a bath again. He was extremely cranky, and we figured it was because he was tired. But I didn't want to keep trying to move up his bedtime yet and was worried if we tried that he's just sleep like a nap and the night would be even later. So we gave him a bath again to stretch out the routine, even though he didn't really need it. He fell pretty sound asleep nursing, but Dave burped him and that woke him up so he was wide eyed before we actually put him in the crib.

10:56 bed
11:05 sleep
9 minutes total, no checks

This is how Neil passed out the 3rd night of sleep training

We were shocked that we didn't check on him once! I'm not sure yet if this was just because he was so tired but it does seem like this method is working so far. I'll either give an update in a separate blog post or in the 6 month update to talk about how this continued.

Just a few things I found interesting...

Even though we tried to keep his bedtime consistent and we went with what seems like his natural bedtime, if you look at the progression, he went to sleep half an hour earlier each night (12:05, 11:31, then 11:05). We woke him up when we would normally wake him up to take him to daycare each morning. Dave normally does wake him up so I know he needs more sleep at night (because he doesn't wake up on his own) but we'll work on that once we have him established to go to sleep on his own in the crib.

When he fell asleep, the first two nights it was mid cry/scream. He did seem to calm down a bit on his own so we didn't go in to check on him but those weren't the times he fell asleep. You just heard crying/screaming and all of a sudden nothing. When we looked at the monitor he was out cold, asleep. It was such a relief and kind of cute other than the fact that we were drained from hearing him so upset.

We are also working on naps and getting him in the cribs for naps but haven't gotten there yet. I will try to write a separate post on that because this one is already long.

My biggest worry now is that he's such a cuddle bug and we're having to make him sleep anywhere but in our arms, including for nap time. I really enjoy some of our cuddle time when he does sleep so I have to admit I'm sad that I'm losing that and thinking I might not be able to do that again :( or he may go back to needing us to get him to sleep at night. Time will tell.

Neil still wakes up happy with a big smile on his face, and sleeps soundly at night once he falls asleep. I was also worried that this would cause him to start waking up at night but he has continued to sleep through the night!

The only picture not from our video camera.
Guess we need a bumper!
(We do have a breathable one.)