4 weeks

I got a positive home pregnancy test at 3 weeks and 4 days, which is pretty early to get a positive. With each of my pregnancies, I've gotten a positive test before 4 weeks and just seemed to know. This time we went to Hershey, PA and I was being careful about drinking (not drinking a lot) and I dunno I just felt like there was a really good chance I could be pregnant. I'm not just saying that after the fact, either. As Dave and I were driving to Hershey, I was talking about names and stuff.


I have a few friends who have had more than 2 miscarriages. From talking to them, I figured I would be more scared than excited getting that positive. Dave and I were trying again to have a baby, so this wasn't unexpected by any means. But it's still kind of scary. 


My initial reaction was almost pure excitement though. I didn't think I'd get a positive that early. I actually took the test because I wanted to drink some of the beer we brought back from Hershey and wanted to make sure it was ok. Guess I won't be drinking those beers now.  Sorry, Dave! :)


I'm finding though, as more time is passing, that I'm getting more scared. I'm praying a LOT. Rubbing my belly when nobody is around and talking to the baby, telling the baby that it's going to be ok and I'm going to protect him/her. My biggest fear right now is the fact that with both of my previous pregnancies, the baby stopped developing before I realized it and I had no idea for a few weeks. How do I know that didn't happen this time? I don't know how to get over this and work through it but at least I know my feelings are natural and normal. Having even one miscarriage takes the innocence of pregnancy away. That's what I'm dealing with right now.


I do have a good feeling about this one though and have since the positive test. I had a dream that I had an ultrasound. It was such a good dream and I woke up happy. The doctor said that the baby is a girl. And I saw the baby on the ultrasound (but as dreams tend to be, it was not realistic at all). Then I realized I never had the earlier ultrasounds that were ordered this time and that I still need to schedule them. But I was so happy that things were ok and it was going to work this time. Now it will be interesting to see if this baby is a girl or a boy.


Speaking of ultrasounds, I will have one at 7 weeks and then the genetic screening between 11-14 weeks. At first I wasn't sure I really wanted the ultrasounds. They don't prevent miscarriages and nothing can be done to prevent one. But having them will bring some reassurance I think I'm going to really need. Believe me, though, walking in for those ultrasounds is going to be nerve racking.


How many weeks: 4


Size of baby: Poppy seed. So tiny!

Total Weight Gain/Loss: I've been tracking my weight with a few coworkers just for accountability.  One of the things that made me just have a feeling I might be pregnant was that I dropped weight and looking at those weigh-ins, I dropped after conception.  So... I'll use my weight at 4 weeks as my starting weight but that is already 4 pounds below what I was before getting pregnant.  So every week I COULD subtract 4.

Maternity Clothes: Definitely not yet

Gender: Not yet. According to my dream, though, girl...

Movement: Not yet

Sleep: I am getting up a lot more in the middle of the night to pee.  I'm not sure if that's because I'm trying to drink more or not. One night I made sure I didn't drink anything a few hours before going to bed and I still got up twice to go to the bathroom. But I'm really tired so I fall right back to sleep.

What I miss: Nothing yet. I did miss out on drinking the beer we brought back but I'm just so thankful for this baby that I'm not missing it yet. I'm sure I will.

Cravings: Nothing yet. 

Aversions: Nothing yet.

Symptoms:  Not really much. It's probably too early anyways. I've been really tired since the half marathon and that's not going away. I think it started because of the half but has continued because of the pregnancy. (And no I was not pregnant during the actual half- they count weeks including 2 weeks before conception- I think because that's a date women can pinpoint to vs. actual conception although I do know the day of conception for us.)  Also, I have been losing some weight easily without exercising and eating the same amount I had been. 

Best moment this week: The positive pregnancy test (guess I count up to 4 weeks, right?  That's how I'll do this)

Looking forward to: Ultrasound at 7 weeks.