5 weeks

It's hard not to tell people I'm pregnant. Saturday we met Dave's family at What's Cooking At Casey's. It's BYOB so it wasn't weird that I wasn't drinking. But his aunt ordered an Italian dessert, didn't care for it, and passed it around the table to try. As soon as I tried it I realized there was alcohol in it. I kind of liked it and she said I should help finish it but I declined and said I was full. The real reason I declined though was the alcohol. Should have checked that (the ingredients on the menu) before I tasted it!


I scheduled two ultrasounds.The first is because of my history of previous losses. They said to get it anytime after 6 weeks but we will be out of town ironically starting the day I will be at 6 weeks. So it's scheduled for close to 7 weeks on June 13th. I scheduled the early genetic screening for July 14th. They said that they will look at the June 13th ultrasound and if the timing is off on the pregnancy, we might need to push back the 2nd ultrasound. I'm pretty confident about the dates though. On July 14th I will be slightly over 11 weeks.  (And it's likely that by the time I post this both of these ultrasounds will be past!)


I will talk a little bit about miscarriages throughout because it does affect future pregnancies. I've had people tell me to just get over it and leave it behind but it's not something you just "get over." And it will affect my emotions throughout this pregnancy. I am really looking forward to the first ultrasound; if we can hear a heartbeat I will probably cry tears of joy and be able to breathe a little bit easier. Until then, though, I am bouncing between being excited and being scared. I'm just so glad I have those excited times. I was worried after 2 losses that this would all be scary. My 2nd pregnancy I was pretty miserable. It was very close to the first loss, and I'm starting to think the real problem there was that I hadn't had time to grieve the first loss. It's been about 6 months (as I write this, not as I post this) since my 2nd loss and Dave and I have had more time to grieve this time and work through some things. Believe me, it's still hard and I think there will always be a little hole (or holes) in my heart. But I'm definitely feeling good so far this pregnancy. I'm starting to get a little cramping which makes me happy because I feel pregnant. And someone just today at work commented on how happy I look right now. :)


How many weeks: 5


Size of baby: Sesame Seed, 2 mm

Total Weight Gain/Loss: I'm down half a pound.

Maternity Clothes: Definitely not yet

Gender: Not yet. 

Movement: Not yet

Sleep: I'm having a lot of pregnant dreams. Most of them seem to be about whether or not the baby is ok. Gee, wonder what's on my mind? ;) I'm trying to not drink much before I go to bed and that seems to help; I'm not getting up as much in the middle of the night. But the dreams wake me up and I lay there thinking and praying about this pregnancy. I keep dreaming about getting ultrasounds. So c'mon, June 13th, get here fast!

What I miss: Still not really anything. For the most part I feel pretty normal. I tease Dave about drinking beer but right now I don't really miss it. And although I had some weird food aversions (to everything) early in the week, that seems to have gone away.

Cravings: Nothing yet. 

Aversions: Over the weekend, which was Memorial Day weekend so a longer one, I seemed to alternate between being hungry and having nothing at all taste good.  Sunday in particular was bad.  Nothing tasted good: hamburger, tomatoes (love tomatoes), chicken parm, french fries, cole slaw...  At first on Monday nothing sounded good but after lunch I started to get hungry and seemed to be fine.  Of course, poor Dave had to eat broccoli with cheese and pizza.  Weird combination?

Symptoms:  My gums have started to feel sore. I have some crampiness. And I definitely have a heightened sense of smell.

Best moment this week: For the most part it's been a good week. I don't have any specific highs (or lows).

Looking forward to: June 13th and my first ultrasound